【The Hitman: Blood Smells Like Roses】

Do you love Spongebob Squarepants?The Hitman: Blood Smells Like Roses Not as much as Jack Rowe does.

The 18-year-old from County Mayo, Ireland, recently unearthed his childhood "Spongebob diary" — a volume full of exuberant love letters to the great yellow sponge himself.

"Dear Spongebob, I am your biggest fan even bigger than everyone else," one entry reads. "I love you Spongebob."

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Rowe also mentions mysterious figures named "Alan" and "Fiona" — mere bandwagon fans who do not love Spongebob as much as he does.

Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

Some entries are even more passionate.

"I wish I was yellow just like you and have holes in my body just like you," the journal says. "I may seem like a copycat but I am not."

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Are you really prepared to live in an undersea pineapple, Jack? Have you checked to make sure you can rent the scuba equipment?

Original image has been replaced. Credit: Mashable

But the journal isn't all self-promotion. Rowe also asked some tough questions: for example, why is Squidward ("squid") so upset all the time?

"I would like to see him nice to you and Pat," wrote Rowe, "but I think that will never happen in life of him."

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We are inclined to agree.

Via Giphy

Rowe tweeted a few shots of the diary on Tuesday — and despite his apparent horror, the Internet has been very supportive.

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See? A strong imagination is nothing to be embarrassed about.

Via Giphy

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[H/T: BuzzFeed]

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